When in Doubt, Look Them Up

A minute of thoughtful online research can turn forgettable small talk into the beginning of a real professional relationship.

You are at a reception when someone introduces you to a person you know you ought to recognize. The name is familiar, but the context is not. Rather than bluffing your way through ten minutes of generic small talk, wait for a natural break and spend sixty seconds on Google, LinkedIn, or the person’s organization website.

A quick look at information someone has chosen to make public can tell you what they do, what they care about, and where your interests overlap. It can also help you ask a better opening question. The point is not to impress the person with your research. It is to listen more intelligently.

Research, Not Surveillance

Used well, real-time research is preparation. Used badly, it feels intrusive. Keep the distinction clear.

• Start with professional sources. Look at the person’s current role, organization biography, recent articles or posts, speaking appearances, mutual connections, and community involvement.
• Avoid third-rail topics. Politics, religion, health, finances, and family are not invitations simply because they appear online.
• Respect a light digital footprint. If a search yields very little, do not treat that as a mystery to solve. It may reflect privacy, limited online activity, or an outdated profile.
• Verify before relying. Online biographies can be stale, incomplete, or wrong. Use what you find as a prompt, not as proof.

Reading Between the Lines

To see how much a public profile can offer, consider this excerpt from my LinkedIn bio:

I’ve been fortunate to enjoy several careers within one lifetime. For fifty years, I practiced law with one of the world’s largest law firms, representing clients worldwide and helping them build successful organizations. I’ve also authored thirteen books, four works of non-fiction and eight novels.  In 2024, I made a deliberate transition from Big Law to a solo practice. 

Today, I continue to practice law with a select group of clients while focusing primarily on two areas: writing books that examine the intersection of technology, ethics, crime, and human behavior, and helping lawyers and law firms with business development, succession, and professional transition.

My latest nonfiction book, From Dawn to Dusk: How to Build a Multimillion Dollar Law Practice and Then Give It Away, reflects what I learned about developing a practice, preparing others to carry it forward, and finding purpose beyond a traditional legal career. It also inspired the From Dawn to Dusk podcast, where I speak with accomplished lawyers about how they built their careers and what came next. Learn more at https://fromdawn2dusk.com.

My latest novel, Deadly Bytes, is an AI thriller about how emerging technology can reshape crime, justice, and society.  More about my books can be found at https://douglasjwood.com.

Whether through consulting, writing, speaking, or podcasting, I aim to share what I have learned, keep learning from others, and help people approach change with greater confidence and perspective. I am always pleased to connect with people whose interests overlap with mine.

What That Profile Gives You

From those few paragraphs, a new contact already knows I would be happy to talk about:

• building and transitioning a global legal practice;
• business development, succession, and professional transition;
• writing nonfiction and novels;
• AI, ethics, crime, and human behavior; and
• launching a podcast and learning from accomplished lawyers.

Any one of those subjects could support a real conversation. The awkward approach would be to recite the profile back to me. The better approach is to choose one thread and invite a story: “What surprised you most about leaving Big Law?” or “What drew you to writing about AI and crime?” or “What have your podcast guests taught you about transition?”

The Rules of Engagement

The goal is to turn public information into a genuine conversation without crossing the line into awkwardness. These rules help:

1. Lead with curiosity, not your dossier. It is fine to mention a professional article, a recent speech, or a shared institution. It is not fine to make someone feel cataloged.
2. Listen first, talk later. Begin with what the other person is doing, thinking about, or trying to solve. When they ask about you, answer briefly and return the spotlight to them.
3. Ask open questions. “How did you make that transition?” creates a conversation. “You left your firm in 2024, correct?” sounds like a deposition.
4. Let personal subjects emerge naturally. My Facebook page may mention my grandson. If you lead with that fact at a mixer, I may wonder how deeply you searched. Let me bring up family first; then follow my lead.
5. Record only what helps you follow up. After the event, note professional interests, promised introductions, and useful context in Outlook or your CRM. Do not turn private details into a data-collection exercise.
6. Follow up with value. Send the article you discussed, make the introduction you offered, or write a brief note that refers to the conversation. The best follow-up proves you listened.

The best networkers do not collect facts; they create moments in which another person feels seen and heard. People hire and refer lawyers they trust, and trust begins when someone feels genuine interest rather than a sales pitch.  When in doubt, look them up. Then put the phone away and listen.